I wrote that mid-day Saturday. I wrote this at 2:30am that night:
“Well… Leah and I broke up. This is such bullshit.
So I go upstairs to hang out with her family. It’s fine… whatever. Then her parents leave and her older brother, who is gay (that becomes relevant shortly), her newly 21-year old sister, Leah and I head out to downtown. Things started out ok. We got a couple drinks, whatev. Her brother’s BF met up with us. Then we went to a bar where there was a dance party. Leah was stupid drunk and was grinding up on her brother’s BF… just so disrespectful. I don’t care if he’s gay or not. No reason for her to grind her ass on this dude’s cock.
Then, as we’re walking down the street Leah starts smoking her brother’s cigarette… so unattractive. Then, her brother suggests a male strip club, and Leah is super pumped about it. I voiced over and over that I did not want to go and was uncomfortable with it, but she was the most pumped of all to go. At that point, I had never been less attracted to Leah. Right as I stepped foot into the strip club, I knew it was over.
How fucking disrespectful can she be in one week? Acting like a robot to me this whole week after telling me she loved me, and then this bullshit tonight… unbelievable. Un-fucking-believable. As I was sitting in the club, I just kept looking at her, looking away and shaking my head.
When we got back home and got out of the cab, I asked if she could give her keys to her sister and come talk with me in my apartment for a minute. When we got in there I told her that she really disrespected me and that I deserve to be treated better. I said that I’ve always been good to her and that I wasn’t getting it back. I said that I don’t deserve this and that I can’t be with someone who would treat me this way. I asked if she had anything to say and she said no, so I opened the door and she left.
So now I’m sitting on my couch, playing my ‘sad’ music (Continuum album by John Mayer), and just so bummed out about this. I do deserve better. I’m very happy I got to see this side of her less than three months into dating instead of taking over four years like it did with Stacy.
Overall, this is too bad… too too bad.”
It was almost as if she did everything she could that night to piss me off. Like it was on purpose. I sat there that night just saying, “What the fuck,” over and over in my head.